The French call it the “Little Death.” But most of us know it as “The Big O.” Its pursuit makes men act like dogs and it can lead a woman to purr like a cat. If we are honest, we’ll realize that much, if not most, of why we work so hard in the gym – to tone up are six-pack or tighten our bums – is basically done to get one, or multiple.

It’s the climax of coitus, the mountaintop of making love and the ultimate fun in fornication. It is… the Almighty Orgasm. The truth is having an orgasm feels so great that the last thing we think about is what is going on. But knowing what’s going on inside of us may help heighten that experience for men, and get to that elusive point for many women – close to 25 percent say they don’t get orgasms through intercourse.  

So kick back, light some candles, put on mood music and get ready to learn what exactly is happening to us when we orgasm. It may not all be pretty, but then neither are our faces when we get one:

Feel the Rush

That building feeling inside of you as you near an orgasm is not a coincidence, it’s actually blood rushing to your nether regions filling your privates with feeling and pressure. This increase in blood flow is what makes men’s members stand at attention and causes a woman’s vagina to tighten on that member and what causes it to increase the secretion of lubrication. 

That’s why knowing what foods and drink will dilate your blood vessels and make blood flow faster is a good idea (Link to Seven Sexy Foods To Get You In the Mood) and why any blood pressure medications may impact your ability to have an orgasm. 

Orgasm Ignorance is Bliss

What we all know about orgasms is that the minute we have one, everything looks different. You’re late on the mortgage; so what! You have to work on the weekend; things could be worse. You just got fired; ehh, you never really liked that job anyway. At least for a minute or two after you orgasm, things just don’t seem to matter that much. But what exactly is happening to make us not care about much of anything? A study at the University of Groningen in Holland might have the answer. 

The study looked at brain activity in women at the moment of orgasm and the results were enlightening. While the area of the brain that control sensations – the primary somatosensory cortex – saw an increase in activity, the parts of the brain that controls alertness and anxiety – the amygdala and hippocampus – dropped off. That explains why all our worries seem to dissipate during and following an orgasm. 

Several other areas of the prefrontal cortex all showed decreasing activity, according to the study. In other words, having an orgasm shuts the parts of your brain that make you worry about everything. Ignorance is bliss. 

Big Finish

Now that we know what our brain is not doing when we climax, it would be helpful to know what our body is. For men, the finish is fairly obvious as the build-up leads to ejaculation and release of sperm. 

For women, the orgasm is the culmination of increasing tension in the vagina and surrounding muscles that is released when in a series of contractions – anywhere from three to 15 that occur simultaneously in the vagina, uterus, and anus.  Both sexes feel the contractions in a variety of places from our heads (that explains funny faces) to our feet (that explains clenched toes).  The contractions are involuntary and cannot be contained – kind of like when you sneeze. The loss of control can be messy, but it is ultimately why we enjoy our orgasms so much. 


  • Improve Sexual Performance
  • Increase Energy & Endurance
  • Maintain Emotional Wellbeing
  • Sharpen Mental Function